August 25, 2007, Saturday

This is the night.

A very special night.

A night of huge comfort from the Lord to us.  A night with a lot of laughs and tears.  A night full of inspiration…

And the name of the Lord was glorified tonight…

Over four hundred people showed up tonight, performers, their parents, grandparents, my four daughters’ friends, and many friends from the communities (my dearest extended families) who have been accompanying us during the past one and half years since Lydia was diagnosed...

All the boys and girls had a great performance of the church summer musical “Living It ALL”.  The musical performance was so good, I was amazed how good it has turned out, because during the last rehearsal, there were still problems and glitches.  God is so good.  He definitely helps in an unspeakable, amazing way.

After the musical, I briefly mentioned to the entire audience how difficult Lydia’s anniversary video was created.  It was after hours and hours of grieving and harsh atmosphere in my house.  Anguish, tears, weight loss, and physical and mental discomfort were the results of the process.  And there were many sleepless nights of Esther and Esther’s friends.  The thirteen and half minutes (out of 20 hours footage I have) of the video clips of Lydia’s final stage of life was shown tonight…

Looked though it again tonight, I still cried, and shuddered like crazy.  Of course, not because the air condition was so strong (although it was), it was those images of Lydia, for her courage, her energy, her sweetness, her determination, her love, her hope, and her strong faith of the Lord, Christ Jesus.  As her father, it was just totally heart breaking for me to watch through it…

After the video, it was a long and total silence in the Sycamore High School big theater, very quiet, (of course very dark also) for several minutes.  Even the youngest children did not make any noise.  It was so silent I could never forget about it.  So that I had time to wipe clean my face (thankfully it was so dark) and for many others too…

The message preached by our church youth director made a very good and true point, that the reason Lydia could live her life with such a great inspiration is because of Lydia’s love and faith of Christ Jesus, our Lord, our savior.

Then, mom and Esther sang the hymn written in memory of Lydia by one of the most prestigious Chinese Christian artists, “If I Still Have Tomorrow”.  Again, it was so difficult for me to hear it.  The lyric is simply too difficult for me to read through.  I have to admire how strong this woman, my wife, Lydia’s mom, is.  She was able to sing the entire song and finish it in front of hundreds of people and did not break down …

 

And this marks Lydia’s one year anniversary. 

As I said one year ago, we miss Lydia so much and dearly with my whole heart out of my body to show it.  I don’t know how long our grief will be…  It still continues days and nights…

We long for the day to meet Lydia again.  I wish that day comes very very soon, either I finish my work on earth soon or the end of the world arrives soon (sorry if you don’t like to hear that).  But before that, let’s

Living It ALL (for the Lord)

Just like Lydia did…