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The toughest situation I’ve been through was dealing with the illness and death of my little sister last year. My sister Lydia was 9 when she was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor, cancer. She ended up spending many of her next months in and out of the hospital doing treatments of radiation and chemotherapy. Lydia was the sister with whom I always identified with most out of my 3 little sisters. Always lively, energetic, vibrant, incredibly intelligent, and willing to try new things. When a suggestion was brought up, Lydia was the first to speak up and enthusiastically support it, or reject it with firm logic. It was impossible to watch as she lost all her hair, her never-ending energy, her walking ability, her speaking ability, and eventually her life. It was unthinkable that the splitting headaches that signified the beginning had led to this in a short 7 months.

Yet despite all that Lydia did lose, what is important is what she kept and gave. She showed love that never failed to truly everyone. Her unceasing faith and hope that her Jesus would heal her inspired all around her. She really did have more faith than any of us. Yes, I always knew that the faith of a child is what we all should have, but this gave me a whole new perspective. I had always felt that if put to the test, my faith would stand. To see my sister of 9 years face this life-threatening disease with such simple acceptance and trust in her Father, put me to shame. I always asked myself, If I were the one with cancer, what would I be like? I hoped that my attitude and faith could be half my sister’s. I have no idea of the pain, frustration, and sadness that she must have felt, but I do know that I probably would not have been able to handle it all. God humbled me through my little sister. Reminding me once again that I have so much room for growth in Him. And also showing me that I have been so blessed, and I need to appreciate all of it always, for He can give and take away. And He will.

These last several months, nearing a year now after her death, have been just as difficult. The pain ebbs and attacks, and ebbs again, but never goes away. Now I face grieving parents whose lives have been shaken and many ideas and opinions dramatically altered. Depression is a word that is now sometimes used in the household. I can not yet see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I know there must be one. God is holding the hands of everyone in the family as we blindly and weakly struggle toward that light. He will bring us out stronger than ever when we are ready. If anything, God is teaching me to hold on, to keep trusting Him, and letting Him guide the way especially in the wake of disaster. And I know He will not let me fall.

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If I am selected as Brio Girl, I hope to be able to encourage my Brio sisters. Just recently I have gone through one of the most difficult situations someone can go through: the death of a sibling. Through it, I continue to learn and grow in the Lord. I want to be able to share my story and help those who have gone through similar circumstances. To offer comfort, encouragement, love, and hope knowing they are not alone in their struggles. There are others like them and God is never far away. I wish to inspire all my sisses to continue to love their Father and to grow in Him. Faith is so very important in all cases: going off to college, tragedies, and regular day-to-day life. My little sister’s faith in the face of death has inspired me, and I wish to share her story to as many as I can, helping others in their own walks to overcome fears, insecurities, and sin in order to mature in Him. And I want all my sisters to know how incredibly much their Heavenly Daddy loves them. I hope to a beacon that illuminates His undying love for each and every one of them. And I wish for them to know that I, as their sister, love them, and can’t wait to see them, if not on this earth, then in our Father’s home, where we will spend eternity together.