February 17, 2008, Sunday

Mom, Esther and Deborah went to the church youth winter retreat for the weekend.

Only daddy and Priscilla at home for the entire weekend.

I took Priscilla out to Skyline Chili for dinner tonight. We sat on a big table, next to a window. Not very many people in the restaurant. Pretty lonely.

“Do you miss mom?” I asked her.

“Yes.” She answered very quickly

“Do you miss Esther and Deborah?”

“Yes.”

I stopped a few seconds. A bit of struggle in my mind.

“Do you miss Lydia?” I had to ask.

“Yes.”

I stopped for another few seconds.

“Whom do you miss the most?

“Lydia.” She answered right away, “Mom and sisters will be home tonight. But it will be many years before we see Lydia again...”

I had big lump on my throat. I could not say a word for next few minutes.

From a nine-year-old girl, “It will be many years before we see Lydia again…”

There is nothing wrong about this sentence. But there are many things I could get out of that,

Her faith, her love for Lydia, her hope, her wish, her belief, her struggle or her reasoning?

We all miss Lydia so much. Often, it became very difficult to get through everyday.

But we have the promise from the Lord. We all believe in that, so did Lydia.

We will meet again in the future. And that is the answer to pretty much everything.

Why we live, why we die, and why are we are still here at this moment…

It’s all for Him.